18
Oct

Bench collapse provides funniest team picture of all time

imageImage via Twitter/@teamthirtythree

Derry City were posing for their official team picture this past week when suddenly the bench in the first row collapsed. We all owe whoever was able to take a snapshot of the carnage a huge “Thank You.”

The second attempt went much more smoothly:

H/T Yahoo!Sports

15
Oct

Mayor of London trips little kid while playing soccer

London Mayor Boris Johnson took part in a friendly kick-around with local schoolchildren on Wednesday, and almost made a mess of the whole affair after tripping up a little boy. Yikes!

Johnson has a history of cynical tackling. He once took down former Germany international Maurizio Gaudino in a 2006 charity match:

The lesson as always: Don’t let politicians play sports.

24
Sep

Kaiserslautern striker joins shortlist for “Worst Miss Ever” award

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It’s really been a banner season for our never-ending “worst miss ever” contest, and it’s still only September! Most of our top submissions so far have come out of Germany, where Wolfsburg’s Junior Malanda has tried his best to make it a one-man show.

But now a new player from the German leagues has thrown his hat in the ring: Kaiserslautern striker Philipp Hofmann.

Just look at all of the bad:

Kaiserslautern still won their match vs Union Berlin 1-0, but they probably should’ve been docked a goal for Hofmann’s inexcusable miss.

So, did that take the cake (so far) for our “Worst Miss Ever?”

Not in our book. That honor still belongs to this man:

HOW!?!?

Vine via Alex Chaffer

24
Sep

Who hit the worse free kick: Julio Dos Santos or Johannes Geis?

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Over the past month or so, we saw so many horrible corner kicks that we were almost concerned over the general well-being of the sport. It truly was an epidemic.

Now it appears we have a new, fast-spreading virus to deal with: free-kick-itis.

Freekickitis is nothing to joke about, people. Just look at the awful effects it can have on an otherwise solid Bundesliga player like Mainz’s Johannes Geis last weekend:

Terrible, right? It’s like the Space Jam aliens stole his talent!

And here’s Julio Dos Santos of Paraguyan club Cerro Poteno falling victim to this gruesome illness:

Let’s put a stop to this now. Spread awareness on freekickitis to your football clubs all around the world, before it is too late.

Image provided by Getty

H/T SBNation

24
Aug

Marseille’s Dimitri Payet hits scoreboard with wayward corner kick

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It’s quickly becoming an epidemic: Nobody can take corner kicks anymore.

First, it was Nantes’ Serge Gakpe. Then it was Keisuke Honda.

Now, this:

Olympique Marseille’s Dimitri Payet was able to accomplish a nearly impossible feat: Hitting Guingamp’s scoreboard with this horrendous corner.

Were it not for the scoreboard, who knows where the ball would have landed. Out of the stadium? Out of the atmosphere? Sadly, we’ll never know.

H/T Reddit

Image provide by Reuters.

18
Aug

Keisuke Honda throws name in the ring for worst corner kick ever

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Earlier today, we showed you a pathetic attempt at a corner kick from Nantes midfielder Serge Gakpé.

Not to be outdone, Keisuke Honda of AC Milan did all in his power to upstage Mr. Gakpé. In a preseason match vs Valencia, Honda somehow, incredibly, blasted the set piece all the way into the furthest reaches of the upper deck. In fact, the ball probably still hasn’t landed.

Watch:

The worst best part? For some reason Honda was allowed to take another corner in the second half. And wouldn’t you know it, the Japenese winger almost produced an exact copy of that horrendous effort:

Hey, at least he hit the ball!

Could we somehow fuse the attempts from Honda and Gakpé together into one, it would surely be a textbook corner kick.

H/T Pies

8
Aug

Jason Sudeikis returns as brilliant Coach Ted Lasso for NBC Sports

Jason Sudeikis is back as American football turned futbol coach Ted Lasso, and the new NBC Sports promo is just as hilarious as last year’s skit.

Since the last time we heard from him, Lasso left his post as Spurs manager for a brief stint as a pundit on NBC’s Premier League broadcast team, during which he routinely pisses off Rebecca Lowe and frustrates Arlo White with his utter lack of common soccer knowledge. Highlights include Lasso still not understanding the rules of relegation and encouraging Fulham fans to “take matters into their own hands” against match referees.

After his failed stint as an analyst, Lasso struggles to assimilate back into American life, missing much of what England has to offer, and mistakes Tim Howard for “the goalkeeper for Everton” at a bar. Ultimately he returns to what he knows best: coaching.

This time around, Lasso takes charge over a catholic school girl’s team - the St. Catherine’s Fighting Owls - whom he teaches exuberant celebrations, how to flop like a pro, and even gets them sponsored by a Middle Eastern airline. Just like a real Premier League team.

Never change, Coach Lasso, never change.

H/T: NBC Sports

10
Jul

Angry Brazil fan smashes TV after defeat to Germany

Fans in Brazil have their own ways of dealing with the humiliation of their country’s 7-1 defeat to Germany - some cried, some booed, and some went a whole lot further.

One particularly enraged Brazilian supporter just couldn’t hide his emotions and went to work on destroying his television.

After ripping the flatscreen from the wall, the fan decides to repeatedly drop the tube - most likely a smash for every goal conceded. Unfortunately, in his fit of rage he’s lost all sense of reasoning and despite the best efforts of one of the family members they’re unable to stop the madness.

Unfortunately for TV sets in Brazil, it doesn’t seem to matter whether the Selecao wins or loses. After their Round of 16 win over Chile in penalties, this poor flat screen suffered the same fate:

3
May

Guingamp fans travel to French Cup final in tractors

imageImage: Twitter/

Forget planes, trains and automobiles. For supporters of French club Guingamp, all you need to get from A to B are … tractors!

Living up to the club’s nickname - ‘The Farmers’ - hundreds of Guingamp fans traveled to Paris for their Coupe de France final against Rennes in the super-slow-moving vehicles. Obviously, this made for some hilarious scenes on French highways:

The trip from Guingamp to Paris takes about four and half hours by car, so you can only imagine how long and uncomfortable that journey must have been. In fact, according to Metro, some fans feared it might take them so long, they reportedly left for Paris a day early and slept in the tractors overnight!

Thankfully the Farmers won the final 2-0 over Rennes for their second-ever cup triumph. Had they lost, that would have made for one miserable drive back!

H/T Metro

26
Mar

Vancouver Whitecaps lose player to ‘off-field walking accident’

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We’ve all been there.

You’re walking around downtown, without a care in the world, when something across the street grabs your attention.

Maybe it’s a cute girl, or boy. Maybe it’s a shiny new Ferrari (humans love shiny things), or a new frozen yogurt shoppe that just looks so appealing! Whatever it may be, you stare a little bit longer, when suddenly — BANG! — down you go. 

What the heck?! That bike rack came out nowhere!

It’s okay, we all eventually fall victim to the occasional walking hazard. Unfortunately, when you’re a professional athlete, the embarrassing mishap quickly goes viral. Sorry, Nigel Reo-Coker.

According to Major League Soccer’s official website, the Vancouver Whitecaps midfielder faces a short spell on the sidelines after what the league termed an “off-field walking accident.” The club confirmed that Reo-Coker was “looking elsewhere while walking when he tripped over a bike rack, cutting his face and hitting his head in the process.” According to the CBC, he also suffered a slight concussion.

Ouch. That sounds pretty rough, though not nearly as brutal as the roasting he’s sure to receive from his teammates. And from his coach, Carl Robinson, for that matter. “I don’t think he was looking where he was going, which is never a good sign for a midfield player,” Robinson deadpanned to reporters.

At least the former West Ham and Aston Villa player can take solace in this: as far as oddball injuries are concerned, it could have been a lot worse.

(H/T MLS)

Composite: USA Today/FOX Sports - Eddie Hon