20
Apr

Too easy! Berbatov’s dream lob sends Monaco into Champions League

imageGetty Images

Dimitar Berbatov wants you to know he’s still the smoothest striker in the game.

On Sunday, the former Fulham and Man United man produced one of the most effortless goals humanly possible to give Monaco a 1-0 win over Nice, which clinched them a spot in next year’s Champions League.

No big deal.

8
Apr

Fourth division player scores Diego Maradona-esque solo goal

You probably haven’t heard of Quique Cubas, but you don’t need to know him to appreciate this amazing goal.

Cubas, a player for regional side Arosa S.C., made five opponents (including the goalkeeper) look absolutely silly en route to one of the best solo efforts since Diego Maradona’s spectacular goal versus England in the 1986 World Cup.

H/T 101GG

28
Mar

Seydou Keita scores fastest goal in La Liga history


Other than recording a Vine video, 7.6 seconds is enough time to do… barely anything. Usain Bolt can’t sprint 100 meters in that time, nor can competitive eating champion Joey Chestnut eat even a single hot dog that fast (it takes him nine seconds).

However, that’s all the time Valencia’s Seydou Keita needed to score the fastest goal in La Liga history against Almeria.

Incredibly, Almeria was the side kicking off on Thursday night, but Keita profited from a truly terribly back-pass to the goalkeeper and pounced for the goal. With the strike, Keita beat out previous record-holder Joseba Llorente, who scored in 7.8 seconds for Valladolid in January 2008.

Not only was Keita’s goal the quickest ever in the Primera Division, it was also his first for the club. However, it wasn’t a perfect evening for the Mali international. Almeria woke up after the blitz attack and came back to earn a 2-2 draw.

26
Mar

Torino’s Ciro Immobile scores volley of the year

Who isn’t a fan of volleys?

Oh, you aren’t? Well, then this video is not for you:

Torino striker Ciro Immobile scored an improbable goal against Roma on Tuesday that will have you questioning gravity and physics and all that nonsense. It also proves not to judge a player by his last name.

Immobile one-timed a high-arching pass from midfield and smashed it perfectly past Roma goalkeeper Morgan De Sanctis for the golazo, which brought back memories Antonio Di Natale’s masterpiece a year ago:

Since that epicness, all volleys have been judged against “the Di Natale.” But after Tuesday, we may have to make “the Immobile” the new high-water mark, even if it doesn’t quite have the same ring to it.

23
Mar

Loaned-out Man United forward scores superb volley

Manchester United disappointment Bebe has been anything but on his loan to Portuguese side Paços de Ferreira. He scored a breathtaking goal — one of several this season — that may give David Moyes something to think about as he tinkers with his roster for next season.

The talented 23-year-old Portuguese back-heel flicked the ball over his head and volleyed home against FC Arouca for a golazo that will surely be added to Bebe’s highlight reel.

H/T r/soccer

22
Mar

Beckhamesque! Wayne Rooney scores from halfway line

imageImages: Reuters

Wayne Rooney makes $500,000 a week for Manchester United, which would normally infuriate every single one of us. But on this weekend, he’s worth every penny of that sum. Why do we say that?

Because look at this goal, that’s why:

Simply stunning.

Rooney’s half-volley rocket from about the halfway line gave United an early, thunderous 1-0 lead over West Ham, and David Moyes a rare reason to jump up off his bench in ecstasy. On the other side, poor Hammers keeper Adrian could only tumble to the ground helplessly as the ball swerved up and over him.

Good thing David Beckham was sitting down. The United legend was in attendance with his sons, clearly impressed by what he just witnessed:

imageImage via: @geniusfootball

Beckham, of course, knows a thing or two about scoring long-range golazos. He smashed one in from a similar spot as Rooney seventeen and a half years ago, against Wimbledon:

So, whose is better?

Sky Sports (h/t BBC Sport) asked Rooney himself if his goal was better than Beckham’s, to which the Rooney replied: “Of course, yeah!”

"It was just instinct," Rooney added. "I turned, had a quick look and saw the keeper off the line. I’ve tried it many times and thankfully it went in."

16
Mar

Golazos! Jordan Pro League is bringing the heat lately

It doesn’t matter whether you’re playing Champions League or Jordan’s Pro League. If you score on an over-the-back heel flick from a good twenty yards out, you’re getting on the Blog! On Saturday, Al-Wihdat forward Motaz Salhani did just that, turning in one of the most outrageous and oddest (or is it luckiest?) goals you’ll ever see against Al-Ramtha.

But wait: there’s more from the Kingdom! That’s right, the JPL has graciously given us a two-for-one ‘Golazo Special’ over the past seven days.

Last Sunday, Al Ramtha were on the right side of a ridiculous goal when right-back Suleiman Al-Salman scored an absolute cracker from his own side of the field against Al Arabi:

Forget the Premier League! We all might need to start watching the Jordan Pro League regularly.

16
Mar

Lionel Messi becomes Barcelona’s all-time leading goalscorer

imageImage: Getty

Lionel Messi scored a hat trick at Osasuna on Sunday to become Barcelona’s all-time leading goalscorer at the tender age of 26! Twenty-six! Messi equaled and overtook Paulino Alcantara’s record with his 369th and 370th goal, the later added a third for good measure.

What. A. Legend.

Check out the hat trick below:

If you’re into math, Messi needed only 452 games to break the record, scoring an average of .82 goals per match. Simply amazing. As a reward, he gets to wear these bad boys soon:

To celebrate Messi’s club goal record, @adidasSoccer unveils limited edition #Messi370 #adizero F50. #teamadidas pic.twitter.com/hXD68JXsZw

With Messi now having run out of club records to break, he’ll set his sights on the all-time La Liga goalscoring record next. With 233 goals to his credit, he is 19 goals shy of Athletic Bilbao legend Telmo Zarra. Look for the Argentinian magician to break that sometime early next season.

12
Mar

Ecuador Under-16 international scores solo goal for the ages

Wait, it’s already time for “The Next Neymar?”

Fabian Tello, a youth international for Ecuador’s Under-16 side, has made his case to become the next dribbling sensation by taking almost the entire Paraguayan team to school en route to one of the greatest solo goals you’ll see. After getting the ball played to him on the left wing, Tello juked his way around six different defenders (beating two of them twice!) before rounding the goalkeeper as well (you know, just for good measure) and drilling home the goal. Scintillating stuff!

And again, Tello is not even 16. You may want to remember his name.

H/T SBNation