5
Sep

Venezuelan national team struck with explosive diarrhea?

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Venezuela manager Cesar Farias is facing quite the selection dilemma before his side’s match against Chile on Friday. 

According to multiple reports, 20 members of Venezuela’s 24-man squad were reportedly unable to practice due to a severe stomach virus. Farias has less than 24 hours to pray that his players recover from what is an ill-timed outbreak of the worst thing in the world.

"They [the squad] didn’t have a good night and they weren’t able to train well." Farias told reporters after Venezuela’s practice on Wednesday.

The cause of the sudden outbreak hasn’t been determined, but it doesn’t take a brain surgeon to figure that it probably involves food poisoning. Which makes you wonder: did 20 players seriously order the same dish? Who does that? Could you be a little less creative?

What’s even worse, Venezuela pretty much have to defeat Chile. The only CONMEBOL side to have never qualified for a World Cup currently sits in sixth place — five points behind fourth-placed Chile — with the top four qualifying automatically and the fifth-place side given a chance to eek into the World Cup through a playoff.

Tied on points with Uruguay and three matches remaining, Venezuela could really use the three points, but first they need their players back.

27
Mar

Luis Suarez is public enemy number one in many people’s book and the Liverpool striker could be in trouble again judging by these pictures from Uruguay’s 2-0 defeat by Chile in a CONMEBOL World Cup qualifier. But does anyone out there have the tiniest bit of sympathy when a defender is tugging your shirt so hard he’s almost inside it? We thought so…

1
Mar

Prison inmate becomes professional soccer player

A Russian drug dealer in a previous life, Maxim Molokoedov is turning his life around.

While serving a three-year sentence in a Chilean prison for drug trafficking, Molokoedov managed to get on the prison soccer team and eventually found a second chance through his natural gift. Talent scouts from local club Santiago Morning received word of the talented Russian inmate, and obtained permission to let him leave the prison to practice with the team until he served his sentence.

Now, Molokoedov is a full-time squad member for the Chilean Second Division club and remains in the country under a working visa.