20
Oct

Paderborn’s Marvin Ducksch hits incredible volley goal

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Newly-promoted Paderborn continue to stir up the Bundesliga with good results and even better goals in their debut season.

Last month, Moritz Stoppelkamp broke a league record with a goal from 80 yards (!) out, and, on Sunday, Marvin Ducksch put away this tidy finish to help Paderborn to a 3-1 win over Eintracht Frankfurt:


Tipped by most experts to finish in last place before the season, Paderborn have instead lost just two of their first eight games — and those defeats were to first-placed Bayern and second-placed Borussia Mönchengladbach — to put them securely in the top half of the table. With a few more golazos, the surprise team of the season might even stay there.

5
Oct

Wolfsburg’s De Bruyne has boot kicked at his crotch

In Sunday’s Bundesliga bout against Wolfsburg, Augsburg’s Tobias Werner was  upset that his boot came off after a 1-on-1 with Kevin De Bruyne.

So he did what anybody would do in that situation — kick his loose shoe at De Bruyne’s privates:

That’s one way to stop the throw-in, we suppose.

Werner got a yellow card for his efforts to make all of us laugh.

4
Oct

Lewandowski scores superb goal to get on track in Bundesliga

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Bad news, Bundesliga. Robert Lewandowski is starting to find his scoring touch again.

After netting just twice in his first eight games as a Bayern Munich player, the 26-year-old bagged his first brace for his new club in a 4-0 win over Hannover.

His second goal was of particularly high quality. Lewandowski took down a perfect Xherdan Shaqiri cross with a wonderful first touch in stride, then slotted home coolly past goalkeeper Ron-Robert Zieler. It’s the kind of goal that will give Bayern fans hope Lewandowski is finally about to break out.

The rest of the league will be less enthusiastic.

29
Sep

Christoph Kramer’s yellow card rescinded after opponent admits to slip

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In a sport where diving and playacting is, sadly, very much old hat by now, Paderborn’s Stefan Kutschke provided a breath of fresh air this weekend.

During Saturday’s Bundesliga match vs Borussia Moenchengladbach, Kutschke drew a yellow card on Christoph Kramer after seemingly getting tripped up by the World Cup star on a counter-attack.

Only it wasn’t a foul. Not even close, actually:

To Kutschke’s credit, even though it certainly looks like he was diving here, the Paderborn forward immediately went over to the referee and explained that he “slipped” rather than gotten fouled. As such, the referee wiped the yellow card off the books and restarted play with a drop ball.

Score one for fair play!

H/T WAATP

Image provided by Getty

20
Sep

This 80-yard goal is one you definitely don’t see every day

Paderborn were just promoted to the Bundesliga last season, and already they’re catching everyone’s attention. Case in point: This audacious goal from Moritz Stoppelkamp on Saturday.

Not only are they adding to highlight reels, but the first-time Bundesliga team are undefeated so far, and currently leading the league:

imageIt’s probably not going to last, but they’re certainly enjoying themselves so far.

(H/T SB Nation)

10
Sep

Jose Mourinho and Pep Guardiola are bickering again and it’s fantastic

imageLittle did we know Mourinho was showing off Guardiola’s bald head. (Getty)

Jose and Pep are our favorite “frenemies” in the world of soccer, and their feud added a new chapter this week at a UEFA coaches summit in Switzerland. 

It turns out that even being in the land of neutrality couldn’t stop the two from bickering. The fight reportedly started over the length of the grass on the pitch. Guardiola thought the length of 3 cm was too long, and wanted it reduced to 1.5 cm, and be watered before every game. This would, according to Pep, make the play faster and more beautiful.

From TZ, the rest of the exchange went as follows:

"Everyone has his style of play, which should be respected," Mourinho responded. "Football can be spectacular in several ways."

"The beauty of football depends on the coach," Guardiola replied. "It seems to me that Mourinho prefers the result to the spectacle. I know to him that’s all that matters."

And it doesn’t end there. El Confidencial reports that Mourinho hit back at Guardiola with a cheap shot about his lack of hair.

"When you enjoy what you do, you don’t lose your hair, and Guardiola is balding. He doesn’t enjoy football."

This is just classic Mourinho. It’s not entirely clear if he actually said this, but we’re really, really hoping he did. 

31
Aug

Junior Malanda is having a rough start to the Bundesliga season

It was just last Friday that Wolfsburg’s Junior Malanda had this horrendous miss against Bayern Munich.

As if he wasn’t already embarrassed enough, this happened on Saturday:

The poor guy just cannot catch a break. Maybe it’s a good thing the international break is coming up. He could probably use some time to reflect (and practice finishing).

30
Aug

Schalke tip cap to miners with awesome new stadium tunnel

Schalke have paid homage to the mining community that supports their side by revamping a tunnel in the Veltins-Arena stadium to look like a coal mine.

The club is nicknamed “the Miners” because of the area’s history of mining, and it’s pretty awesome to see Schalke embracing it.

With clubs like Bundesliga champion Bayern Munich lining up in the dark, imposing tunnel alongside Schalke’s squad, we’d say the pregame intimidation factor gets a bump in Schalke’s favor.

Let’s just take one more look at that:

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Awesome stuff.

(h/t Metro)

23
Aug

Leverkusen’s Karim Bellarabi scores fastest goal in Bundesliga history

imageBayer Leverkusen’s Karim Bellarabi scored the fastest goal in the Bundesliga’s 52-year history, needing just nine seconds to bury one past Borussia Dortmund keeper Roman Weidenfeller in the match of the day:

Bellarabi silenced the sold-out Signal Iduna crowd, slotting home after taking Sebastian Boenisch’s pass and dancing past new Dortmund signing Mathias Ginter.

Nine seconds. Simply amazing.

Image: Getty Images

22
Aug

This is probably the worst miss to happen in soccer ever

It is not an exaggeration to say that Junior Malanda will never, ever live this miss down. It has to be one of the worst — if not the worst of the worst — miss to ever happen in a soccer match. There aren’t words to do it justice, so just watch in awe.

Just…how? The ball was practically on the line already, he just had to push it over. A puppy could score that.

To make matters worse, Wolfsburg lost to Bayern, 2-1, and had Malanda managed to tuck that one away, it would’ve been a huge draw in their Bundesliga opener, and only their second point ever in Munich. It was not to be.