20
Aug

Man gets Man U tattoo because his name is already “Mr. Manchester United”

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Quite possibly the nuttiest football fan in the world, “Mr. Manchester United” — yes, that is his actual, legal name — now has United’s club badge tattooed on his forehead.

Our sources say that Mr. Manchester United got the tattoo out of fear nobody knew exactly just how big his love for Manchester United really was….

In all seriousness, the fan did offer an explanation for this to The Sun, and it is hilarious:

'The tattoo's my ID card,' he said. 'People don't look at me in a funny way, they look in admiration.' 'Now, whenever someone asks my name, I point to my forehead and smile. It makes me stand out and proves my loyalty to United,' he added.

Earlier this year, Zdravkov Levidzhov won a 15-year legal battle to change his name to Mr. Manchester United.

Mr. United drew inspiration for his name - and life - change after watching the Red Devils’ victory over Bayern Munich in the 1999 UEFA Champions League Final… on TV. (He wasn’t even there? Some fan!)

Oh, and his cat’s name is “David Beckham.” Of course it is.

(H/T and Image: The Sun)

4
Aug

German ice hockey team plays “ice football”

Well this looks like a fun, completely safe time.

Ice football? What could possibly go wrong?!

That’s right, German ice hockey team EHC Wolfsburg Grizzly Adams offered their fans something a little bit different during a recent pre-season training session, taking part in a soccer scrimmage — on the ice!

As you can see, the only thing wackier than the light-hearted practice was the punishment for the losers - they had to perform somersaults on the ice.

The pros might make it look easy, but please don’t try this home. We cannot stress that enough.

H/T Metro

2
Jun

Colombian town stages sheep soccer match to celebrate World Cup

image"Neymar" embarks on a scintillating run down the touchline (Image: AP)

The Colombian town of Nobsa celebrated the imminent start to the World Cup by staging a soccer match played entirely by sheep.

Split into two teams — one representing Colombia and the other World Cup hosts Brazil — the sheep were dressed in customized jerseys and named in honor of the actual stars that will take the field in a week’s time.

According to the AP, roughly 500 “beer-soused” spectators showed up to watch the four-legged footballers, who were “trained for two weeks to recognize and kick a foam soccer ball through a rustic goalpost made of wooden logs.”

Judging from the AP’s “official” match report, the sheep could have benefited from a longer training camp:

The hard work was little in evidence, though. Sheep are highly social animals, seeking safety from predators in large herds, and their shepherd handlers had to keep pulling on ropes tied to the animals’ necks to keep the bleating players scattered and moving so they wouldn’t end up munching lazily on what grass remained on the improvised pitch.

Thankfully, The Guardian has dug up footage of this sporting spectacle, which the Colombia sheep won, 4-3:

Let’s hope the real action we’ll see in Brazil won’t be this baaaaaaad.

(h/t The Big Lead)

26
Oct

Burnley mascot gets sent off for trolling referee’s assistant

Championship side Burnley FC made headlines on Saturday by claiming the league lead with a 2-0 win against Queens Park Rangers, but perhaps the bigger story from that match was a bizarre red card shown to Burnley’s mascot.

That’s right, “Bertie the Bee” was thrown from the game in the first half after handing a linesman a pair of over-sized glasses after a dodge decision. Sadly, referee Simon Hooper didn’t find the humor in it.

Police actually escorted Bertie Bee off the field and later, a picture emerged of the criminal locked up in a cell. This might be the greatest picture ever taken:

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Mind you, this is the same mascot who once bravely tackled a streaker during a match against Preston years ago:

24
Aug

Hoffenheim’s Salihovic converts PK, promptly gets sent off for slapping opponent

Hoffenheim’s wild affair against SC Freiburg in the Bundesliga on Saturday produced a total of six goals as well as not one, not two, but three red cards.

The most bizarre sending off was undoubtedly drawn by Hoffenheim’s Sejad Salihovic. After converting a penalty kick in only the 9th minute, Salihovic and teammates celebrated right at the Freiburg goal, drawing the ire of SC goalkeeper Oliver Baumann and captain Julian Schuster. Salihovic then incredulously decided to slap Schuster in the face, for which the referee instantly went to his back pocket.

Hmm. Score a PK and get sent off right away, with barely ten minutes played. Interesting strategy, Cotton.

Here is the slap again in slow motion, because everything is better in slow motion:

Salihovic’s brain fart set the tone for a wild Saturday in the German league. A total of seven players were sent off in six matches, with Schalke’s match vs Hannover also supplying three red cards. Looks like a bunch of people woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.

9
Aug

It’s happened…Mario Balotelli bought himself a pet pig

 

Several weeks ago, AC Milan star Mario Balotelli claimed he wanted to buy himself a pet. Not a dog, nor a cat, not even a hamster. No, Balotelli told the world he wanted himself a pig.

Guess he wasn’t just blowing smoke:

Clever name choice, Mario. I see what you did there.

Only questions we have for you are:

Will “Super” be sporting a mohawk soon? And how is your fiancée going to feel having to fight for your attention with, well, a pig?

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Actually, on second thought, if she keeps wearing things like that, I don’t think she’ll have a problem.

5
Aug

Keeper saves penalty, teammates promptly score own goal

Despite winning the match, Veracruz goalkeeper Edgar Hernandez’s day was almost ruined thanks to a remarkably silly own goal.

After Hernandez clumsily brought down a Cruz Azul player for a penalty, the backstop made the save to seemingly keep his team’s two-goal lead in tact. However, amazingly, the ball rebounded to a Veracruz defender, whose heinous attempt at a clearance ricocheted off a second teammate and past a hapless Hernandez into the net.

Now as a goalkeeper, few things are as exhilarating as stopping a penalty kick. To then have someone else snatch away your mojo like that, now that’s just devastating. The guilty pair of defenders who made this OG possible are more than lucky this didn’t cost them the game.

17
Jul

Do the Duck!

Someone’s gotta tell the Germans to stop dancing in public. Last month, it was Michael Ballack making a fool out of himself. This time, it’s Arsenal defender Per Mertesacker.

 Mertesacker and teammate Bacary Sagna were asked to entertain fans in Vietnam at an Arsenal fan party. One player came out unscathed (Sagna), while the other will struggle to shake off these images for a while.

Mertesacker rose onto the stage and began performing a bizarre duck-style dance, which we can only hope he was asked to perform! At least Per showed he knows how to have a good time.

Via (101GG)

12
Jul

Brazilian TV measures Hulk’s bum; it’s bigger than we thought

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During the Confederations Cup, social media was all abuzz over Brazilian forward Hulk. No, not because of his name, or his tendency to blow chance after chance, but because of his “hulky” behind!

After many fans, reporters and even players pointed out that Hulk might possibly have the biggest bum in sports, Brazilian TV show “Esquenta” took up the case, convincing the burly forward to have his heinie measured on live television.

Turns out, we totally undersold the magnitude of this man’s backside.

The circumference of Hulk’s buttocks measured an astounding 43.7 inches. To put that into proper context, Hulk beats out Brazil’s current “Miss BumBum,” Andressa Urach, by a full 4 inches! You can see a comparison below:

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(Pics via Globo.com and 101GG)

23
Jun

Brighton & Hove Albion boss finds out about sacking on live TV

Now, nobody likes getting fired. But can you think of anything worse than finding out you’re fired while you’re on live television?

Yeah, we can’t think of anything either. So, meet poor Brighton & Hove Albion manager, er, ex-manager Gus Poyet.

Poyet, on air as a pundit for BBC’s coverage of the Confederations Cup, got the bad news from the show’s production team during a commercial break, after Brighton announced the sacking on their website. The insulting part? The club’s statement claimed it had notified their manager of the sacking.

Based on Poyet’s reaction, they clearly had not.

Why did Poyet have to go? It might have something to do with the suspension he received a month ago after comments he made on his players, who smeared feces - yes, feces - all over the dressing room of visiting rivals Crystal Palace before their Premier League promotion playoffs game, which Brighton lost. Just a hunch.

After that incident, Club executive Paul Barber issued an official statement, but did not address Poyet’s subsequent suspension:

"We apologized to Crystal Palace as soon as the vandalism in their dressing room was discovered, and again more formally a few days after the match. As a result of what happened, please rest assured we have reviewed our internal procedures to guard against this ever happening again."

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