23
Apr

Jermaine Jones gets ultimate ‘Murica knee tattoo

In case you weren’t sure, Jermaine Jones loves the United States of America a lot. So much so that the former Schalke 04 mdifielder got this red, white and blue (and probably very painful) tattoo on his knee:

Jones isn’t the only United States men’s national team player that’s had his American pride inked on his body. Terrence Boyd got this bad boy about a year ago, showing off his commitment to the stars and stripes:

Other players, like Clint Dempsey and John Brooks, display their USA pride by representing their home towns on their skin:

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Dempsey will always be a Texas boy at heart. (Image: The Denim Kit)

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Brooks has Germany (where he was born) on one elbow, and Illinois (his father’s home state) on the other. This was well before his ill-advised gigantic back tattoo that got him benched (Image: Men in Blazers).

It’s probably a safe bet that there will be a few more USA players tatted up after this summer’s World Cup in Brazil — nothing like a bit of body art to commemorate a special event.

17
Apr

USA defender John Anthony Brooks benched due to giant back tattoo

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Getting tattoos is all fun and games until you can’t do your job.

According to the Berliner Morgenpost, United States men’s national team defender John Anthony Brooks was benched by Bundesliga club Hertha BSC Berlin last weekend after Brooks got himself a “large-scale” back tattoo, which hence has prevented him from being able to play comfortably.

Of course. 

As tattoo-lovers know, for several days following the procedure, one is advised to avoid intense physical activity, tight-fitting clothing, and sweaty conditions, among other things.

In hindsight, as a professional athlete Brooks should probably have known better than to get ink done in the middle of the season.

Understandably, Hertha coach Jos Luhukay was not pleased:

"I don’t have any understanding for that. The tattoo could lead to an inflammation, and, naturally, that is not good," Luhukay told the paper.

Nope, not good. Next time, wait until after the season, John.

(H/T SBNation)

Image provide by Getty.

6
Apr

Poor Aron Johannsson gets ‘inappropriately touched’ by opponent

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AZ and US national team striker Aron Johannsson was the victim of on-field bullying in the Eredivisie this weekend, getting his privates pulled by Roda defender Guy Ramos.

Ramos appeared to squeeze the Icelandic-American’s genitals in response to something Johannsson had to say, and the referee let him off scot-free. However, Ramos did get sent off in the second half of the game, while Johannsson scored to secure AZ a draw, so at least justice was somewhat served.

If you have a Y chromosome, chances are you are solemnly nodding to yourself right now, having been hit in that area probably more than once.  Ladies, admit it: this is worse than getting your hair yanked by an opponent, albeit similar. Completely uncalled for and painful.

Here’s “The Grab:”

H/T Dirty Tackle

1
Apr

USMNT’s World Cup away jerseys actually have color!

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Remember how we all moaned and groaned over the United States’ lackluster, plain white World Cup home jerseys?

Well, for all you color enthusiasts out there, perhaps the away kits are more to your liking. Nike released the alternate World Cup uniforms for the US on Tuesday, and yes, they kind of look like a bizarro version of the Dutch flag. Or one of those sweet popsicles we all had as kids:

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According to Nike Soccer, each kit features a unique name and number font, directly influenced by American sport teams. In addition, each number on the back of the jersey will have a small US Soccer crest at the bottom that offers a unique touch unlike any other previous away kit.

“I like the patriotic design and color scheme and I think it will look great on the pitch,” United States men’s national team captain Clint Dempsey told Nike Soccer. “Hopefully they will serve us well as we head into a competitive group.”

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Dempsey wasn’t alone in his assessment.

“The new kits fit really well, look great and most importantly, are really comfortable, especially when we are running all over the field for 90 minutes in all sorts of different weather,” added United States women’s nation team striker Sydney Leroux. “All of us on the team are environmentally conscious so the fact that it is sustainably designed using recycled Dri-FIT  polyester is also a big plus.”

Undoubtedly the most patriotic jerseys since these back in 1994.

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Images provided by Nike Soccer and Reuters.

5
Mar

USA fail to impress in 2-0 exhibition loss to Ukraine

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The United States men’s national team slumped to the occasion in their 2-0 loss to Ukraine in a friendly marred by circumstances on Wednesday. Goals from Andriy Yarmolenko and Marko Devic dealt Jurgen Klinsmann’s squad a harsh blow in a wholly deserved loss. It was the final game in which Klinsmann had his European-based players at his disposal before convening his World Cup camp in mid-May, and he cannot have been pleased with what he saw.

"This game helped us a lot to see where individual players are, collectively where we stand with this group of players," Klinsmann said on ESPN after the match. "Obviously we had to form a couple of new things there, starting from the back line — and you could see that, that they never played together that much."

His motley USA side, comprised of a few regulars and a slew of players on the bubble, were outsmarted by a cunning Ukrainian side. Knowing full-well where the Americans were weak, Yarmolenko and Yevhen Konoplyanka tore their flanks to shreds while the high defensive line was pelted with through balls.

The tentative American defense let the Ukrainians stroll through its line several times early on. In the 12th minute, a simple ball over the top caught the central defensive pairing of Oguchi Onyewu and John Brooks well out of position. That put Denys Harmash through on Tim Howard’s goal by himself. The American goalkeeper made a fine stop on his attempt, but Harmash coolly collected the rebound and laid it wide for Yarmolenko for him to pass the ball into the net.

Just a few minutes later, the Americans were caught out again on a clever play off a Ukrainian corner, but they were saved by a possibly erroneous offside call that time – Alejandro Bedoya actually appeared to keep the play onside. Sloppy and unimaginative in possession, the Yanks produced just two attacks of note in the entire first half. On the first, goalkeeper Andriy Pyatov alertly picked off the cross; on the second, Edgar Castillo’s cross wasn’t quite right and cleared. And they would give away several more fat chances, which a more incisive opponent might have punished, before the halftime whistle brought a respite.

Read More

21
Feb

The rumored USA kit is very, very blah

Just 110 days before the World Cup, USA fans may have received an early look at what their team will be wearing in Brazil.

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(Image via Todos Sobre Camisetas)

Yikes! It looks more like an Old Navy polo than a soccer jersey. But lucky for all of us, USMNT fans are quite the, umm, creative bunch.

Pour one out for kit nerds everywhere.