21
Apr

Betis defender makes pair of costly mistakes, quits before halftime

imageImage: Sergio Barrenechea/EPA

Sometimes, it just all becomes too much to take. For Real Betis defender Paulão, this was one of those times.

The Brazilian center back asked to be taken off the pitch barely a half hour into Betis’ match against Rayo Vallecano after he made two disastrous mistakes that both led to goals, and which all but crushed his team’s final hopes of staving off relegation. (Betis went on to lose to Rayo by that very two-goal margin, and with the club ten points from safety and just four games remaining, their fate is all but mathematically sealed.)

Paulão set up the first goal of the game in the 14th minute with an astoundingly weak back-pass to his goalkeeper, which Rayo’s Ruben Rochina easily intercepted and slotted home. Ouch! Thirteen minutes later, Paulão scored an own goal when his sliding clearance attempt went awry. Double ouch.

His two mistakes were so bad, even Rayo captain Roberto Trashorras went over to help Paulão off the ground and offer his condolences. But in spite of everyone’s pity and support, the imposing defender had reached his breaking point and wished to be substituted right then and there. His manager obliged, and Paulão spent the rest of the afternoon in tears on the end of the bench. Poor fella.

H/T The Guardian

27
Oct

Freiburg keeper achieves rare hat-trick of howlers

image

Dazed and confused: Baumann can’t believe his own performance (Image: Getty)

Being a goalkeeper is a tough gig. Either you’re the hero, or the zero.

In Oliver Baumann’s case, it was clearly the latter on Sunday. Though Freiburg lost 3-0 to Hamburg — a scoreline that would indicate thorough domination by the away side — it was Baumann who practically determined the outcome by himself, committing three gruesome errors that lead to all three goals.

Watch:

Perhaps Baumann was just in the Halloween mood and tricked all the home supporters? Because that’s some scary-bad goalkeeping.

Baumann, Freiburg’s captain and actually one of the better goalkeepers in the Bundesliga last season, will want to erase this game from his memory as soon as possible. He should expect, however, to be tested with a lot more long balls for the rest of the season!

4
Sep

Goalkeeper of world’s unluckiest team charged with biting man’s ear off

Somehow, it’s gotten even worse for the running slapstick comedy known as Peruvian side Union Comercio.

Goalkeeper Juan “Chiquito” Flores has received a three-year suspended prison sentence for being found guilty of biting a man’s ear off in a nightclub last year. Flores will also have to pay 10,000 Peruvian Nuevo Sol (around $3,550) in damages to his victim.

If you recall, the Mike Tyson imitator in question is the same “Chiquito” who was found guilty of this colossal fail last month:

Although we would miss Flores and his knack for providing us with fantastic content, perhaps Union would be better off without him? Just saying.

Peruvian side Union Comercio has been featured on this blog fairly often recently, and those who read us regularly know that can’t be a good thing.

Union has provided bloggers everywhere with a continuous stream of mind-numbing fails all summer (such as the ones above), and unsurprisingly, the club currently sit rock bottom of the Peruvian Primera Division with relegation a distinct possibility.

At least, with the Peruvian league set to finish in December, that still gives us a bit over three more months of Union Comercio follies. We can’t wait to see what Flores and Co. come up with next:

(Image courtesy of Raul Sifuentes/LatinContent/Getty Images)

11
Aug

Two for one! The weekend’s best goalkeeper fails

image

Chelsea back-up Mark Schwarzer had himself a senior moment in the club’s friendly against Roma on Saturday, allowing the softest of goals to hand Roma an opening lead. Now, goalkeepers are not known for their nimble footwork, but how can you mess up like this:

That was bad, but could it possibly be worse than this next clip?

Over in Peru, Unión Comercio’s Juan Flores tried to act super cool and ended up looking very dumb after this colossal fail just six minutes into a match against Sporting Cristal:

Do we even need to ask which one is worse?

21
Jul

It’s Not Easy Being a Goalkeeper

The new European soccer season is fast approaching, which can only mean one thing: a new season of hilarious howlers is upon us. Yes, the anticipation is killing us, too.

Until then, luckily there’s always soccer being played somewhere, and we’ve been blessed with a pair of delicious fails this weekend that’ll make you spit out your coffee. First up, a poor judgement call by a keeper in the Korean K-League led to a goal scored from 90 yards:

That’s pretty bad, but does it “top” this next clip? We highly doubt it.

The German 2nd division began play again this weekend, and in the match between Cologne and Dynamo Dresden, Cologne’s Timo Horn was clearly caught off guard by a back pass and, amazingly, decided to juggle his way out of trouble in his own penalty area:

He gets style points for the attempt, but he might want to leave the juggling to the rest of the team:

(Via 101GG)