World Cup Day 13: The Good, The Bad, and The (very) Ugly

June 24th, 2014


Hungry for another World Cup recap? Chew on this:

Suarez’s third career bite for club and country was obviously THE viral story of the day, so we’re going to start with “the ugly” and save the best good for last. Bon appetit! 



Suarez is making a habit of snacking on his opponents (is human flesh really that tasty? Is the joke on us?). The Liverpool star was suspended ten Premier League games for biting Chelsea’s Branislav Ivanovic last season, and 7 games by the Dutch league for munching on PSV’s Ottman Bakkal in 2010 while at Ajax. 

On Tuesday, Italy defender Giorgio Chiellini became Vampire Suarez’s latest victim. Note the bite mark on Chiellini’s shoulder in the picture above. The referee did not see it, so no foul was called, but the rest of the world’s population did and responded accordingly:

When the incident first happened, we weren’t exactly sure if Suarez seriously did it again. Good thing we have video replay now:

Yup. He really did it. For a THIRD time. Which begs the following, excellent questions:

If only these vendors had told Suarez this before the game:

In Suarez’s defense…

Oh yes, the Internet’s got jokes!

By the looks of it the shoulder could’ve used a bit more salt:




Lost in all the commotion of Luis Suarez’s latest hunger attack was the fact that we had to bid adieu to two World Cup legends - Andrea Pirlo and Gianluigu Buffon. The 2006 winners quietly closed the book on what is likely their last major tournament, and certainly their last World Cup.

So say good-bye to Buffon’s tears…


…and Pirlo’s glorious beard and hair…


…and say good-bye to the greatest national anthem at the World Cup:


Though Italy failed to get out of the group stage in each of the past two World Cups now, they’re still doing better than Cote d’Ivoire.

The Elephants’ “Golden Generation” around Didier Drogba and Yaya Toure led the country to the past three World Cups but were eliminated in the opening round on each occasion. None were more heart-breaking than this latest exit, sealed by a Greek penalty kick in stoppage time:

This is probably the saddest picture of the entire World Cup:




There was some good that came out of Tuesday. In fact, history was made.

Colombia manager Jose Pekerman provided us with one of the most touching moments of this incredible tournament when he subbed on reserve goalkeeper Faryd Mondragon. At 43 years and 3 days old, he is the oldest player to ever appear at a World Cup, besting legendary Cameroon striker Roger Milla (42 years, 39 days at the 1990 World Cup):

Take a bow, son grandpa!


And hey! Let’s not forget about the Ticos!


Costa Rica completed its trifecta of World Cup surprises by securing a point against against England, meaning the team that was considered dead on arrival before the tournament began did not lose to any of its three opponents in the so-called “Group of Champions.” Good joke, that!

The Ticos now get to play Greece for a chance to reach their first ever quarterfinal:

CONQUER-CAF, indeed!

Images provided by Getty, Reuters and

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